Monday, March 29, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
J-Team '10
Looks like God wants me back in Jamaica this summer. Maybe it's to lead worship for the team or maybe it's just to check on my little man O'shane. Who knows. I don't know what God is thinking. I have no money saved. And I don't even know if there is a spot open, but I definitely feel that's where I'm meant to be. And if this is what God wants, He'll make a way.
I really should be studying for my biology test tomorrow, but here I am...
The subject of worship has been popping up in my life a lot recently. I feel like maybe it’s God's subtle way of telling me what He’s calling me to do? I don’t know. That's a whole different blog. However my point in writing this one is to just share what comes to my mind when I think about worship. And that is David.
David is one of my heroes. His prayers and songs were so honest and open. He sang when he was broken hearted, full of joy, when he screwed up, when he was convicted, and even when he was afraid. That is because David understood the true meaning of worship.
When I say worship, every person reading this will have a different idea of what that word means. To some, worship is just lights, guitars, a stage, etc. To others, maybe it’s singing a hymn or two before the pastor speaks. But worship is so much more than that. Since my dad’s in ministry, I've been in many different churches and I've seen many different styles of "worship". But I think somewhere along the way, it's become a selfish practice. People show up on sunday morning to get what they can out of worship and they fail to realize that worship has nothing to do with we want at all. And until that changes, we'll continue to miss out on something beautiful. Worship is sacrifice. It’s not about me and it's not about what I want.
I think David said it best. He'd fallen into sin and was told to buy a piece of land to sacrifice on in order to repent. So he went to this man in order to buy his threshing floor. The man told David that he could just have it free of charge. But David refused his offer. This was his response: "I will not give unto God that which cost me nothing."
To me, that is a perfect picture of worship. David didn't want to take a free threshing floor and give that over to God because God deserves something far more precious. Worship is costly, whether that be our time or even our dignity. I remember overhearing an older lady in our church talking to someone about the song “Undignified” one time saying she thought the song was silly and she refused to be undignified. She said that she was a Godly woman and to be undignified was just wrong. That was so sad to me. What is dignity but a pretty mask for pride to hide behind? As christians, we are to be like Christ. And Christ, the son of God, hung on a dirty, shameful cross for sins He did not commit. We actually talked about this in New Testament recently, but one of the main reasons Jews give for Jesus not being the messiah was because He was crucified. And Crucifixion was considered one of the lowest forms of punishment reserved only for those rejected by society. So why would the Son of God allow himself to die in such a humiliating manner? If Jesus could put dignity aside so that I might have life, that is more than enough for me to be undignified in my worship. Who cares what other people think? How can we truly worship when all we're thinking about is what others are thinking of us, the music being played, or songs being sung? Worship is falling at the feet of Jesus, pouring out all we are, and realizing who He is. True worship, pure worship, starts by the condition of our heart as we enter into it. It requires something of us. It is sacrificial, introspective, humiliating, and honest. Without that, the words are just words. The music is just lines and notes on a page. It is in that raw, honest moment of humility and surrender before the throne of God that we breathe life unto what we are singing. Worship isn't just singing how awesome God is, it's realizing how insignificant we are. I want my worship to be like David’s. I want my worship to be honest, and if that's crying out to God in anguish because I'm in a deep valley looking up at a mountain, than so be it. I won't let anyone tell me what worship is or isn't. It doesn't have to be pretty. Worship is too beautiful a thing to waste. And I would hate to miss out on that.
Maybe I’m just rambling now. It’s really late and I’m half asleep. But I guess I’ve heard/read so much about worship lately I just had some overflow thoughts. The end.
The subject of worship has been popping up in my life a lot recently. I feel like maybe it’s God's subtle way of telling me what He’s calling me to do? I don’t know. That's a whole different blog. However my point in writing this one is to just share what comes to my mind when I think about worship. And that is David.
David is one of my heroes. His prayers and songs were so honest and open. He sang when he was broken hearted, full of joy, when he screwed up, when he was convicted, and even when he was afraid. That is because David understood the true meaning of worship.
When I say worship, every person reading this will have a different idea of what that word means. To some, worship is just lights, guitars, a stage, etc. To others, maybe it’s singing a hymn or two before the pastor speaks. But worship is so much more than that. Since my dad’s in ministry, I've been in many different churches and I've seen many different styles of "worship". But I think somewhere along the way, it's become a selfish practice. People show up on sunday morning to get what they can out of worship and they fail to realize that worship has nothing to do with we want at all. And until that changes, we'll continue to miss out on something beautiful. Worship is sacrifice. It’s not about me and it's not about what I want.
I think David said it best. He'd fallen into sin and was told to buy a piece of land to sacrifice on in order to repent. So he went to this man in order to buy his threshing floor. The man told David that he could just have it free of charge. But David refused his offer. This was his response: "I will not give unto God that which cost me nothing."
To me, that is a perfect picture of worship. David didn't want to take a free threshing floor and give that over to God because God deserves something far more precious. Worship is costly, whether that be our time or even our dignity. I remember overhearing an older lady in our church talking to someone about the song “Undignified” one time saying she thought the song was silly and she refused to be undignified. She said that she was a Godly woman and to be undignified was just wrong. That was so sad to me. What is dignity but a pretty mask for pride to hide behind? As christians, we are to be like Christ. And Christ, the son of God, hung on a dirty, shameful cross for sins He did not commit. We actually talked about this in New Testament recently, but one of the main reasons Jews give for Jesus not being the messiah was because He was crucified. And Crucifixion was considered one of the lowest forms of punishment reserved only for those rejected by society. So why would the Son of God allow himself to die in such a humiliating manner? If Jesus could put dignity aside so that I might have life, that is more than enough for me to be undignified in my worship. Who cares what other people think? How can we truly worship when all we're thinking about is what others are thinking of us, the music being played, or songs being sung? Worship is falling at the feet of Jesus, pouring out all we are, and realizing who He is. True worship, pure worship, starts by the condition of our heart as we enter into it. It requires something of us. It is sacrificial, introspective, humiliating, and honest. Without that, the words are just words. The music is just lines and notes on a page. It is in that raw, honest moment of humility and surrender before the throne of God that we breathe life unto what we are singing. Worship isn't just singing how awesome God is, it's realizing how insignificant we are. I want my worship to be like David’s. I want my worship to be honest, and if that's crying out to God in anguish because I'm in a deep valley looking up at a mountain, than so be it. I won't let anyone tell me what worship is or isn't. It doesn't have to be pretty. Worship is too beautiful a thing to waste. And I would hate to miss out on that.
Maybe I’m just rambling now. It’s really late and I’m half asleep. But I guess I’ve heard/read so much about worship lately I just had some overflow thoughts. The end.
Monday, February 15, 2010
A post about nothing.
I have this dream (and it might be a foolish dream) that the man I marry is a musician. And not the famous kind, the quiet humble kind. I don't care if he's even in a band, I just want to be able to make music with him. I want his voice to be the last thing I hear before I fall asleep at night. I want to be able to come to him with a song and have him fill in the missing pieces. I want to sing our children to sleep together, like my parents did for me and my sisters.
It’s silly; I know. Probably selfish. But I've always thought about it.
On a random note, this made me laugh today.
It’s silly; I know. Probably selfish. But I've always thought about it.
On a random note, this made me laugh today.
bits of wisdom? i have collected thus far today.
If you have to start a sentence with, “I probably shouldn’t say this but…” then you probably shouldn’t say it. just sayin’.
All red candy is delicious.
All yellow candy is disgusting. (with the exception of lemon heads.)
Also, if you are a guy and you’d like to make a girl feel loved. give her a flower. leave it on her car. doesn’t matter. it’s cheesy, cliche, and we love it.*
* I said that last statement speaking for other girls. There are some girls who hate it. But for the record, most love it.
All red candy is delicious.
All yellow candy is disgusting. (with the exception of lemon heads.)
Also, if you are a guy and you’d like to make a girl feel loved. give her a flower. leave it on her car. doesn’t matter. it’s cheesy, cliche, and we love it.*
* I said that last statement speaking for other girls. There are some girls who hate it. But for the record, most love it.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
Went outside to look at the snow with my dog friday night and just had some stuff on my mind. There were already a few inches of snow on the ground and the snow was still coming down heavily in large flakes. I stood by a tree in my front yard just by the street light. The road that runs in front of my house, which is usually fairly busy, was still and quiet. I watched as the snow caught the light from the streetlights as it fell and I couldn't help but stand in awe of the beauty of it. My street, which is normally filled with various cars and mismatched houses (some with very unkept yards), looked pristine in its newly found veil. You couldn't see anything but a perfect, spotless, blanket of white. And it painted me this picture of grace.
How much are we like that street? Some of us have big houses with perfectly manicured lawns while others are struggling to keep the inside of their houses together, let alone keep up the outside. But no matter how clean and perfect we might think our lives are, nothing compares to that stark white canvas. No matter how dirty we think we are or how far away from beautiful we may feel, the snow covers it all up.
Grace covers us like that snow covered the street. The snow doesn't choose what it covers; it just falls where it falls. God doesn't judge what our lives look like when we ask Him to cover us. He covers us in spite of what we are. He sees the beauty, the potential of what we could become if we allow ourselves to be covered in His grace. No matter how broken we are, that grace is more than enough to cover us and fill any holes we may have, like the snow filling and covering all the blemishes of a weather worn road.
How much are we like that street? Some of us have big houses with perfectly manicured lawns while others are struggling to keep the inside of their houses together, let alone keep up the outside. But no matter how clean and perfect we might think our lives are, nothing compares to that stark white canvas. No matter how dirty we think we are or how far away from beautiful we may feel, the snow covers it all up.
Grace covers us like that snow covered the street. The snow doesn't choose what it covers; it just falls where it falls. God doesn't judge what our lives look like when we ask Him to cover us. He covers us in spite of what we are. He sees the beauty, the potential of what we could become if we allow ourselves to be covered in His grace. No matter how broken we are, that grace is more than enough to cover us and fill any holes we may have, like the snow filling and covering all the blemishes of a weather worn road.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)